Monday, May 14, 2012

See you in September

Sarah tells me - and she's right - that I tend to do everything black and white, all or none. And she's right. (Don't you hate seeing the worst of your family genes run thick in your own blood? I sure do!) She knows me pretty well, and so I'm thinking - blog some, what I feel, when I feel, after I've taken a season off. I need a season off.

As we were traveling this past week I'd have a fleeting moment when thoughts came to mind, my heart swelling up, big lump in my throat, my mind running back to memories 25 or more years ago. What to do with those? I HAVE to write them down! And fight the tendency to edit out too much of the raw truth. My painting professor from years ago told me I tend to grab the smallest brush there is and squeeze the living daylights out of it, rather than grab a bigger one and let the paint fly. I want to paint boldly with a bigger brush here - wide strokes that fly across the canvas, but still with discretion. Something I find difficult about blogging is editing as you go - knowing what's on your heart, but not being able to really put that out there for everyone to see. Amy Grant put it brilliantly, "Some things you take to the grave." Amen, Amy! I'm still trying to figure that one out.

But I want to share with you the momma swallow that built a nest over the front door, her four babies have hatched and she spends most of her day hovering over them (man, can I relate to that one!); the sound the blue heron crane makes as it flies across the lake; feelings that flood my heart when I see our grandkids big smiles and drooly faces, share the memories we're making with them*; our new grandbaby coming this fall; this journey of retirement we're on, what we're learning, the mistakes we've made and how we keep getting back up to try to do it better another day; what we're learning at Open Table and the Care Center, and the trips we're taking with family; the good, bad and ugly of life and how God miraculously comes in and redeems all of it.

So I'll be back here in September - after I take the entire summer off. Refresh, rearrange, do some catch up, clean out, culling; travel a lot, and get ready to make some pretty big changes to our lives. There will be much to blog about. No other clues or comments - I'll work hard, play too, love on all those important to me, and be back in the fall. How about that, Leah?

I have to run - I've just received an invitation to enjoy a glass of wine in the middle of the lake. Can't say no to that.

Happy summer everyone!

* When our grandson, visiting from Idaho, met a friend of ours in church last week, he said, "Hello, my name is Landon. My momma said if she sees a scorpion while she's here in Texas she's gonna wet her pants."(she did, and she didn't.)

9 comments:

Sarah said...

Well, good! (I couldn't, for some reason, leave a comment on the last post.) I saw Leah's comment and wholeheartedly agreed, and besides, quitting altogether really is quite extreme, right? ;) And I know we talk a lot and see each other a lot, but I still love reading your heart on these pages, and I'm very glad you saw the light of moderation. Leslie is good for us, no?

Now go eat some candy, or buy a book, or shop for some fabric ;)

Love you!

Bev said...

Sarah - your comment made me giggle outloud! And I totally get it - I know you so inside out, but still reading your writing gives me a different glimpse. 'All things in moderation', except we know some are not even good in moderation, but most are. And yes, that includes fabric and books and candy because all three make my heart happy! xoxo

Bev said...

Sarah - blogging here come fall, with a bigger brush but still discretion. Writing on my unpublished blog those things on my heart that should not go beyond there. I love what Amy Grant said in her autobiography, "Some things you take to the grave."

Leah in Iowa said...

I felt encouraged to see a new post in my Reader, and ECSTATIC to hear your "goodbye" is now just a "see you later". Tears in my eyes and a smile on my face - go figure! But I'm happy. :) Enjoy your summer!!

Jill said...

I'm so glad that you are only taking a season off. Your words of wisdom have really been a light to my path; since you are a little ahead of me on the journey it's nice to have some insight into the joys and challenges ahead. It gives me the courage to face the next chapter and the one after that....
May God give you a new song in your heart, a great break from the everyday and tons of great memories with the grandkids at the lake this summer.
Can't wait to "see" you again in September

d said...

So glad it is just a break. I didn't know what to write after the last post-but I'd be so sad to never hear how you are doing and what you are learning. I rarely comment but have been reading regularly.
Have a great summer!!!

Kelli said...

I will miss you, but I totally get it. And I am SO incredibly tickled about Sarah and the new baby.

Rest.

I will be here, Whenever.

Fonda said...

So excited about this news! I was so sad to see you say goodbye. Although we have never met, I felt like I was losing a friend and mentor. Yours is one of the first blogs I ever read (I think I found you through 5 minutes for books, which was my first!) I felt like your words of wisdom were always sent to me at just the right time. Like Jill, I am a little behind you on this life journey so you have been an inspiration to me to look to the future with hope. Best of wishes for a fun filled and relaxing summer with your family. And I will be praying for you as you write on that 'other' blog with broad stokes...even if it never sees the light of day! God's blessings on you and yours.

Robin in New Jersey said...

oh, shoot! I just found you again and now you are leaving.

Have a great summer, Bev.